While my son and I were walking to his bus stop this morning, we passed some men who had been working on a tree. They had probably sawn it up and were taking it away. That's pretty good before 8:45 in the morning. Whatever they had done, there was a beautiful, natural smell in the air. I loved it and was instantly transported back to a forest somewhere. I felt like I would like to be in a forest again. I like the outdoors but rarely find myself in a natural woodsy setting.
This got me thinking about how many other things I and other people would enjoy, whether we've tried the things before or not, but we just don't do them. There are so many, many things to do wherever one lives and for me at least, I have my accepted list of activities and I don't often try much new. How sad.
I know that, maybe about 4 or 5 years ago, I ended up at a little girl's birthday party with my son and tried roller skating for the first time in a very long while. I kind of got the hang of it and thought that I should try new things more often. Hey, recently, I was bold and tried sun dried tomato couscous. That paid off as I loved it. I seems that when I have tried things, the effort can really be worth it. But why don't I try things more often?
I guess one reason is that I don't look for opportunities. I find that I can become somewhat comfortable with my life as it is and not feel a need to venture into new domains. I should look around though and see what's out there. Activities don't have to be expensive - one can go for a nature walk, take an art class through continuing education, form a group of writers, or readers, or mothers, or fathers, or cooks (I wouldn't be in the last 2). There are opportunities to volunteer or try rollerskating or swimming or skating or rock climbing. I've been interested in rock climbing for a while despite a longtime fear of heights. I realize I am not even scratching the surface of possibilities here - I guess I haven't looked for any for a while . But I'm just pointing out that there are so many things to try that might help us experience more of life's richness.
I don't know what I'll do in response to this. Tonight I think I'll watch 30 Rock and go to bed. Admittedly, neither is too innovative. Maybe I'll sit in a different spot for the show. You see, I do need to try new things. And I think trying things bigger than moving to a new seat will prove to be very wonderful.
JAHD
Flowers in California
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
The Joy Within
Some of my posts have had a theme of decluttering. Some have had a theme of not buying more clutter. I'm glad they tie together. It would seem crazy if I reported throwing out boxes and boxes of things and then going on wild spending sprees. Although I do want shoes. I like shoes and they're pretty important. And fun.
Anyways, I am happy to report that focusing less on things and the accumulation of them has in no way resulted in me being less happy. I have ups and downs but having fewer things seems to make no difference at all. The items are not missed - new or old. I want to see even more empty space.
The thing I find interesting at this point is that, while marketers try to make us believe that we should buy things that can bring us joy and so many other wonderful feelings, the place where I have found a great deal of joy lately is in sitting at this desk and writing this blog. Yes, I need a computer but it was already here. I simply looked within and, with some encouragement, found what I needed to do.
I'm not saying that this blog is earth-shattering or anything but I am saying that we don't need to keep looking outside to find joy. Sometimes it with us all along. Waiting to be found.
JAHD
Anyways, I am happy to report that focusing less on things and the accumulation of them has in no way resulted in me being less happy. I have ups and downs but having fewer things seems to make no difference at all. The items are not missed - new or old. I want to see even more empty space.
The thing I find interesting at this point is that, while marketers try to make us believe that we should buy things that can bring us joy and so many other wonderful feelings, the place where I have found a great deal of joy lately is in sitting at this desk and writing this blog. Yes, I need a computer but it was already here. I simply looked within and, with some encouragement, found what I needed to do.
I'm not saying that this blog is earth-shattering or anything but I am saying that we don't need to keep looking outside to find joy. Sometimes it with us all along. Waiting to be found.
JAHD
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Standing (and Standing) in Line at the Grocery Store
This evening I went grocery shopping with my son. It was 10% Tuesday. I like to get there for the savings and saved over $60. The savings is based on prices at a relatively expensive store but still, it's better than paying full price. And my son accompanied me and really helped. He's great.
For some reason, although the line-up wasn't long, there was a delay with the customer in front of us. The cashier had to look through the items on the receipt, sort out something with the customer and generally delay me from getting home to eat. I had already remained very cheerful through another mysterious delay at Starbucks. But I do stay cheerful as best I can. It doesn't do any good to put anger out there into the world.
As I stood there, and stood there, I had time to look at a number of magazines that were conveniently placed at the cash desk. Some of them dealt with how to get organized. Well, there's less to organize if you don't buy magazines. I bought none of them. Some dealt with better ways to clean. I can figure that out on my own. I just have to do it. Some dealt with entertainers with whom I am not familiar. Those ones were easy to turn down.
It seems nice to me to buy a magazine at the grocery store. I remember my Dad doing that for my Mum when he did the shopping. But the magazines come home and the magazines pile up. And what are we really buying? If I see the word "Organized," I'm tempted to buy the magazine because I want to be organized. Here's my money, I like that idea. And so it goes with other words and concepts relating to self-discovery, friendship, weight loss, quick meals, super foods, health, and exercise. And more. Really, though, we know what we want to work on, we can seek out the information we need and we don't need the magazines. The publishers and advertisers need us but we really don't need them.
So, I didn't buy any magazines this evening. Nor any of the chocolate and gum that was behind me. It's a little less exciting being this reasonable. But at least I indulged in a coffee that I didn't need. I can't be good all the time!
JAHD
For some reason, although the line-up wasn't long, there was a delay with the customer in front of us. The cashier had to look through the items on the receipt, sort out something with the customer and generally delay me from getting home to eat. I had already remained very cheerful through another mysterious delay at Starbucks. But I do stay cheerful as best I can. It doesn't do any good to put anger out there into the world.
As I stood there, and stood there, I had time to look at a number of magazines that were conveniently placed at the cash desk. Some of them dealt with how to get organized. Well, there's less to organize if you don't buy magazines. I bought none of them. Some dealt with better ways to clean. I can figure that out on my own. I just have to do it. Some dealt with entertainers with whom I am not familiar. Those ones were easy to turn down.
It seems nice to me to buy a magazine at the grocery store. I remember my Dad doing that for my Mum when he did the shopping. But the magazines come home and the magazines pile up. And what are we really buying? If I see the word "Organized," I'm tempted to buy the magazine because I want to be organized. Here's my money, I like that idea. And so it goes with other words and concepts relating to self-discovery, friendship, weight loss, quick meals, super foods, health, and exercise. And more. Really, though, we know what we want to work on, we can seek out the information we need and we don't need the magazines. The publishers and advertisers need us but we really don't need them.
So, I didn't buy any magazines this evening. Nor any of the chocolate and gum that was behind me. It's a little less exciting being this reasonable. But at least I indulged in a coffee that I didn't need. I can't be good all the time!
JAHD
Monday, April 5, 2010
Like a Grey Spring Day
In spring we welcome the beautiful warm, sunny days which start to appear. Spring is here! Winter's over! Things are good! There is renewal.
And then, there is a cloudy, windy, cold day. Did we only imagine that spring was here? Was it real? Will it ever come back?
In life, or at least in my life, sometimes one goes to some dark places. For whatever reasons, to whatever places. Life gets us down. But with whatever strength we have, and work, luck and the help of others, we get back up. We clean things up. We start a blog. We laugh out loud. We shine again.
And then, a few things happen or don't happen that disappoint us. Individually, they may not be that big but they add up. We feel a little down. We feel discouraged. And we wonder, was it all for nothing? Are we still in the same place after all? Does it not matter what we do, it will all end up pretty much the same?
I choose no as the answer to those questions. Positive changes lead to more positive changes and the effects accumulate. Good things happen! Change takes place! Our little corner of the world becomes a better place!
As Joni Mitchell sings "I've looked at love from both sides now." Well, I've looked at life from both sides and I choose the side that I'm on now. There will be grey days but there will be sunshine too. I've experienced it. I believe that it will come back.
JAHD
And then, there is a cloudy, windy, cold day. Did we only imagine that spring was here? Was it real? Will it ever come back?
In life, or at least in my life, sometimes one goes to some dark places. For whatever reasons, to whatever places. Life gets us down. But with whatever strength we have, and work, luck and the help of others, we get back up. We clean things up. We start a blog. We laugh out loud. We shine again.
And then, a few things happen or don't happen that disappoint us. Individually, they may not be that big but they add up. We feel a little down. We feel discouraged. And we wonder, was it all for nothing? Are we still in the same place after all? Does it not matter what we do, it will all end up pretty much the same?
I choose no as the answer to those questions. Positive changes lead to more positive changes and the effects accumulate. Good things happen! Change takes place! Our little corner of the world becomes a better place!
As Joni Mitchell sings "I've looked at love from both sides now." Well, I've looked at life from both sides and I choose the side that I'm on now. There will be grey days but there will be sunshine too. I've experienced it. I believe that it will come back.
JAHD
Saturday, April 3, 2010
At the End of the Day
It's 11:07 in this time zone and soon, after feeding and tucking in my rabbit (ok, maybe not quite tucking in but as close as you come to that with a rabbit), I will head to bed. I look forward to it.
At the end of the day, I consider it to be a good thing to be tired. Ideally it means that you have used up energy and are ready for sleep. There are different ways to be tired, though. I like it when I feel physically tired. I don't like it so much when I feel emotionally drained. That would be how I feel tonight.
It's not like today was a bad day. It's just that a lot of emotions were brought to the surface. And that can be tiring. Maybe taking a lot of things to Goodwill as part of the decluttering had an effect on me. Maybe noticing that the house still doesn't look as good as I want it to after that bothered me. Maybe watching the movie Juno (which my husband and I thought was excellent) stirred things up. Who knows? I just had a lot of strong emotions.
Although I'm exhausted and long for sleep, I am glad that I felt things and cried today. Emotions of all kinds are part of the human experience. Today I had some bad ones. I just hope that I will let myself feel the good ones when they come along. Sometimes I have a lot of trouble with that. That may be a whole other entry or entries.
I hope that the Easter bunny finds everybody tomorrow and that everyone enjoys a nice day!
Oh, and thank you to my friend Carrie. Sometimes someone says things to you right when you need to hear them.
JAHD
At the end of the day, I consider it to be a good thing to be tired. Ideally it means that you have used up energy and are ready for sleep. There are different ways to be tired, though. I like it when I feel physically tired. I don't like it so much when I feel emotionally drained. That would be how I feel tonight.
It's not like today was a bad day. It's just that a lot of emotions were brought to the surface. And that can be tiring. Maybe taking a lot of things to Goodwill as part of the decluttering had an effect on me. Maybe noticing that the house still doesn't look as good as I want it to after that bothered me. Maybe watching the movie Juno (which my husband and I thought was excellent) stirred things up. Who knows? I just had a lot of strong emotions.
Although I'm exhausted and long for sleep, I am glad that I felt things and cried today. Emotions of all kinds are part of the human experience. Today I had some bad ones. I just hope that I will let myself feel the good ones when they come along. Sometimes I have a lot of trouble with that. That may be a whole other entry or entries.
I hope that the Easter bunny finds everybody tomorrow and that everyone enjoys a nice day!
Oh, and thank you to my friend Carrie. Sometimes someone says things to you right when you need to hear them.
JAHD
Friday, April 2, 2010
An Ironic Tale about Books
The condensed version of this story would be that I bought a book that convinced me to get rid of many books. If the computer runs into problems yet again, maybe that will be all of the tale I tell. I think that things are fine with the computer now and although the Telus repairperson will be a little disappointed when he or she comes to fix it, I am pleased.
So, I was in a bookstore and I saw a book called "Clutter Busting." As often happens with me and books, I bought it. That's why I shouldn't go to book stores too often. (Maybe I just shouldn't shop now that Bath and Body Works is out of bounds too). Anyways, I brought the book home, read it, loved it and was very excited about getting rid of clutter. I don't know how much success I had right away but I must have cleared out some things. As you may know from earlier entries, this is a theme with me right now.
I decided to reread this book this week. As I got reading and thinking, I began to accept the idea that getting rid of self-help books may be good. Yesterday morning, I started gathering books. They weren't hard to find.
On the main level of my home yesterday, I found 31 self-help books. They vary in subject and some dip into spirituality but all are in some way purchased for the purpose of improving me and/or my life.
The thinking in the "Clutter Busting" book is that we are good enough without so much stuff and also without these books. The books show I have not felt that this was true. One is actually called, and this is sad, "Will I Ever Be Good Enough?" I know that even in my teenage years, I had a sign up in my room to "Ameliorez-vous" or improve yourself. Wow.
I think or hope that I'm starting to feel more positive about me. A very good friend of mine asked today, after learning of the 31 books, "what on earth would you want to change?" I'm not saying that there aren't things to change but there are a lot of things about myself worth holding onto as well.
Clearly I haven't been the only poor soul out there buying self-help books or there wouldn't be sections in bookstores devoted to them. As my husband wisely said today though, I've only made the authors happy by buying the books.
I have more book shelf space now and ideally more energy in my life to devote to new things. I really like the concepts in the Clutter Busting book.
The question now is "What should I do with THAT book?"
JAHD
So, I was in a bookstore and I saw a book called "Clutter Busting." As often happens with me and books, I bought it. That's why I shouldn't go to book stores too often. (Maybe I just shouldn't shop now that Bath and Body Works is out of bounds too). Anyways, I brought the book home, read it, loved it and was very excited about getting rid of clutter. I don't know how much success I had right away but I must have cleared out some things. As you may know from earlier entries, this is a theme with me right now.
I decided to reread this book this week. As I got reading and thinking, I began to accept the idea that getting rid of self-help books may be good. Yesterday morning, I started gathering books. They weren't hard to find.
On the main level of my home yesterday, I found 31 self-help books. They vary in subject and some dip into spirituality but all are in some way purchased for the purpose of improving me and/or my life.
The thinking in the "Clutter Busting" book is that we are good enough without so much stuff and also without these books. The books show I have not felt that this was true. One is actually called, and this is sad, "Will I Ever Be Good Enough?" I know that even in my teenage years, I had a sign up in my room to "Ameliorez-vous" or improve yourself. Wow.
I think or hope that I'm starting to feel more positive about me. A very good friend of mine asked today, after learning of the 31 books, "what on earth would you want to change?" I'm not saying that there aren't things to change but there are a lot of things about myself worth holding onto as well.
Clearly I haven't been the only poor soul out there buying self-help books or there wouldn't be sections in bookstores devoted to them. As my husband wisely said today though, I've only made the authors happy by buying the books.
I have more book shelf space now and ideally more energy in my life to devote to new things. I really like the concepts in the Clutter Busting book.
The question now is "What should I do with THAT book?"
JAHD
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Computer Problems
As it is my bedtime this post will not be long. I have encountered numerous frustrating computer problems today. If they persist, my husband will get on the phone to Telus and be frustrated for an hour with them. As long as we get our means of communication back. It's tough when it's unavailable.
Other than that, I won't say much for today. If I do, it won't be brilliant. At all.
See you tomorrow hopefully.
JAHD
Other than that, I won't say much for today. If I do, it won't be brilliant. At all.
See you tomorrow hopefully.
JAHD
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
On the Menu Today - Rabbit
Today I took my son to a restaurant downtown that both of us really like. He's a wonderful young man to take out and he loves the macaroni and cheese. All in all, we both ended up having nice meals and a nice time.
The little issue I had with the restaurant today was the first special on the list. The friendly server started to list the specials and mentioned the rabbit dish. I immediately said "We have a pet rabbit!" She went on to list the other specials.
Hearing me say that, the server probably feared that she may have upset my son. He can take it though. And while I can deal with it as I know that some of us do eat meat (in my case reluctantly), it is me that has the big attachment to rabbits.
Since 1990, I have owned 5 rabbits. I wonder if I'm forgetting some. Currently, we have Freckles. She's sweet but currently, believe it or not at Easter time, makes a clucking sound. Don't ask. All of them have been wonderful and unique and some of them have been really feisty too. Rabbits are not boring, furry blobs.
The rabbit thing in my family goes back before my time and I am carrying on the legacy. I may get tired of cleaning up rabbit droppings and feeding Timothy Hay to an animal inside the house (I just don't think that hay belongs in a house) but I love bunnies and I will never eat one.
I just think I should have really put pressure on the server and told her that we also have a pet quail and that we farm pastramis. Then she would have been really concerned.
JAHD
The little issue I had with the restaurant today was the first special on the list. The friendly server started to list the specials and mentioned the rabbit dish. I immediately said "We have a pet rabbit!" She went on to list the other specials.
Hearing me say that, the server probably feared that she may have upset my son. He can take it though. And while I can deal with it as I know that some of us do eat meat (in my case reluctantly), it is me that has the big attachment to rabbits.
Since 1990, I have owned 5 rabbits. I wonder if I'm forgetting some. Currently, we have Freckles. She's sweet but currently, believe it or not at Easter time, makes a clucking sound. Don't ask. All of them have been wonderful and unique and some of them have been really feisty too. Rabbits are not boring, furry blobs.
The rabbit thing in my family goes back before my time and I am carrying on the legacy. I may get tired of cleaning up rabbit droppings and feeding Timothy Hay to an animal inside the house (I just don't think that hay belongs in a house) but I love bunnies and I will never eat one.
I just think I should have really put pressure on the server and told her that we also have a pet quail and that we farm pastramis. Then she would have been really concerned.
JAHD
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Good Neighbours
Since my husband and I moved into our house 15 1/2 years ago (yes, that long) we have had good neighbours. We didn't know that too much at first. We were both working and aside from when we were doing gardening and things outside, we didn't see neighbours a lot.
Then we had our son. I won't go into a lot of details but his early birth caused a lot of stir. Suddenly my neighbour Marianne was ready to help out. She visited my son in the NICU, washing up and putting the gown on as we all had to do. She visited when it was me and him home during the day and I was so worried about everything to do with him. She was ready to babysit as soon as we were ready to leave him with her.
As my son grew, he got to know Marianne and Norm better. Both were always willing to help. And eggs, spaghetti sauce and other ingredients flew back and forth (maybe not flew, especially the eggs) between the houses when someone needed an ingredient quickly.
The morning that Marianne showed me the floorplans for their new house 3 provinces away (o.k. it's my home province but it doesn't help), I cried. I felt betrayed. I came to feel better about it but, still, they were leaving.
A young couple with small children bought the house. That was great but I did not know what they would be like. Marianne introduced us but still, you just don't know.
Well, it's about 2 years later now and at dinnertime today, I went next door to get sour cream. I was greeted by 2 wonderful little boys that I adore and J & H who were eating dinner. (Didn't mean to interrupt.) Our new neighbours are wonderful. We couldn't ask for better ones.
This evening is not the first time that food has again travelled back and forth since they moved in. There have also been some snacks and meals eaten together, babysitting done on both sides, children playing together and people trying to help each other through difficulties.
I'm writing this to show my neighbours (one of whom is a Facebook friend) how much I value them and also to express my wish that everyone finds neighbours like ours. It is truly a gift.
JAHD
Then we had our son. I won't go into a lot of details but his early birth caused a lot of stir. Suddenly my neighbour Marianne was ready to help out. She visited my son in the NICU, washing up and putting the gown on as we all had to do. She visited when it was me and him home during the day and I was so worried about everything to do with him. She was ready to babysit as soon as we were ready to leave him with her.
As my son grew, he got to know Marianne and Norm better. Both were always willing to help. And eggs, spaghetti sauce and other ingredients flew back and forth (maybe not flew, especially the eggs) between the houses when someone needed an ingredient quickly.
The morning that Marianne showed me the floorplans for their new house 3 provinces away (o.k. it's my home province but it doesn't help), I cried. I felt betrayed. I came to feel better about it but, still, they were leaving.
A young couple with small children bought the house. That was great but I did not know what they would be like. Marianne introduced us but still, you just don't know.
Well, it's about 2 years later now and at dinnertime today, I went next door to get sour cream. I was greeted by 2 wonderful little boys that I adore and J & H who were eating dinner. (Didn't mean to interrupt.) Our new neighbours are wonderful. We couldn't ask for better ones.
This evening is not the first time that food has again travelled back and forth since they moved in. There have also been some snacks and meals eaten together, babysitting done on both sides, children playing together and people trying to help each other through difficulties.
I'm writing this to show my neighbours (one of whom is a Facebook friend) how much I value them and also to express my wish that everyone finds neighbours like ours. It is truly a gift.
JAHD
Monday, March 29, 2010
Retail Victim
As I have mentioned before on this blog, I think that there's too much stuff in this house. Whatever it all is. I've spent some time decluttering and have made some progress. So far, so good.
Today I went to a movie and mall with my son. The movie wasn't as good as we'd hoped but the mall was, as usual, nice. And I didn't come out of it with multiple bags of new items. That is good too.
What I did buy at the mall today was a body mist called Optimism. I know things about how retailers market. I know that they want you to buy the experience and they make you believe that buying this one thing will change your life. Somehow though, at this one store, time and again, I still buy into it. The store is Bath & Body Works. I should never go in there.
I don't know what it is about Bath & Body Works. I get greeted every time but I don't know that that's the secret. Sometimes I don't greet well at other stores. I'm kind of an independent shopper. At Wal-Mart, the greeters tend to avoid me. It's like I put out an anti-greeting warning. It works. At B&BW, though, they greet me right away so there's no time for the alarm. And then there are all the pretty pictures on the products, and the names, and the scents. Oh the scents. My son won't come in the store because of the scents but I sprayed my coat today so he sneezed on the way home anyways. He was not impressed. Oops. Before I make it to the back of the store, I am again buying a product. This time it's Optimism in a bottle.
I would love to find out that this product works. Maybe it will? Still, though, I can't keep doing this. If I want to have less stuff, not to mention stop wasting money, I have to be more rational about purchases.
If spraying this stuff on me (and making my poor son sneeze some more) works, I will announce it far and wide. If not, maybe I'll avoid going in that store next time. That's where it all starts.
Happy shopping! I hope you're better at it than me.
JAHD
Today I went to a movie and mall with my son. The movie wasn't as good as we'd hoped but the mall was, as usual, nice. And I didn't come out of it with multiple bags of new items. That is good too.
What I did buy at the mall today was a body mist called Optimism. I know things about how retailers market. I know that they want you to buy the experience and they make you believe that buying this one thing will change your life. Somehow though, at this one store, time and again, I still buy into it. The store is Bath & Body Works. I should never go in there.
I don't know what it is about Bath & Body Works. I get greeted every time but I don't know that that's the secret. Sometimes I don't greet well at other stores. I'm kind of an independent shopper. At Wal-Mart, the greeters tend to avoid me. It's like I put out an anti-greeting warning. It works. At B&BW, though, they greet me right away so there's no time for the alarm. And then there are all the pretty pictures on the products, and the names, and the scents. Oh the scents. My son won't come in the store because of the scents but I sprayed my coat today so he sneezed on the way home anyways. He was not impressed. Oops. Before I make it to the back of the store, I am again buying a product. This time it's Optimism in a bottle.
I would love to find out that this product works. Maybe it will? Still, though, I can't keep doing this. If I want to have less stuff, not to mention stop wasting money, I have to be more rational about purchases.
If spraying this stuff on me (and making my poor son sneeze some more) works, I will announce it far and wide. If not, maybe I'll avoid going in that store next time. That's where it all starts.
Happy shopping! I hope you're better at it than me.
JAHD
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