Flowers in California

Flowers in California

Friday, June 6, 2014

On Razor Blades and Driving

I noticed a razor blade on the pavement the other day. It was within a pedestrian crosswalk, as was I. In trying to figure out why it ended up there, I came up with only a few reasonable possibilities:

1.  Someone (possibly a man, could be a woman) was driving along and shaving when they had to brake suddenly. The blade flew out of their razor and they were so preoccupied with the traffic situation (as they should have been all along) that they left the blade behind and did not finish shaving whatever body part they'd been working on.

2. Someone needed to change blades while they were driving and shaving. Probably an especially tricky procedure to undertake while driving, they couldn't handle the intricacies of it and the blade fell out the window.

3. Someone was slicing fruit, perhaps into a decorative shape, while they were driving and they lost their grip on the blade. You might be thinking "Wait, you fool, people don't use razors to slice decorative fruit." My response to that would be, how can we explain the choices someone who works on fruit art while driving makes? These people are different - we can't necessarily know their motivations. I assume you're sorry you called me a fool now.

4. Someone was driving along after just purchasing razor blades. Suddenly they decided that yes, they were going to grow a beard (again, possibly a man, maybe a woman) and they no longer needed razor blades. Dumping their purchase on the road is impulsive, and littering is not good, but we all make impulsive decisions at times which we may regret later (like writing this entry).

5. A pedestrian was engaged in any of the above activities (except the driving) and dropped the blade on the road. Perhaps they'd encountered a threatening traffic situation (likely caused by an inattentive driver who's shaving) or engaged in some personal clumsiness. Let's not forget that pedestrians can be too inattentive too and are just as likely as drivers to be carving fruit or engaging in personal grooming at an inopportune time.

Maybe others can come up with additional explanations for the presence of that razor blade. I don't know. Be careful, my friends, and please don't shave or carve fruit while driving or walking. I think we've all learned that now.

JAHD


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